I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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