apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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