I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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