Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
