After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
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