dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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