I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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