So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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