I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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