Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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