he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
