so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
