so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
