so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
