Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I need to wash the frat house off of me
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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