The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
