you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Randomize