is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
As shirtless as possible
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
