Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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