take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
