I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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