We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
