I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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