Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
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