My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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