i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
i think im in europe. pls send help
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
