ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize