Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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