How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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