bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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