do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
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I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
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I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.