Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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