remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
