Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
