You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize