so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
