well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
