with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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