just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
