Got a toothbrush?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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