If i come over, it means nothing
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
