Quick, to the slutcave!
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Randomize
