so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
