i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
