My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
