But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
