looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize