I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
