so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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