the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
