He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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