Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
