Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
