I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I am one with the molecules
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize
